Thank God. I mean, literally, you can thank god for bringing on Hurricane Sandy. Of course god isn’t just some sadistic schmuck, wreaking havoc for the sake of it. He’s trying to wake us up to a danger that is infinitely greater than any natural disaster you could imagine: homosexuality. I can’t take credit for this insight into god’s motives. It comes from author and Chaplain John McTernan, who also moonlights as a meteorological analyst.
During Hurricane Isaac, McTernan hypothesized, “It could be that God is putting an end to this city and its wickedness,” since “New Orleans is still hosting Southern Decadence with open homosexuality manifesting in the streets of the city.” And he warned “Let’s all watch this very closely, because if New Orleans is destroyed, it is a sure sign that the final judgment for the national sin of America has arrived.” New Orleans survived, so that wasn’t the final judgement.