In a nightmare for all hateful bigots, two lesbians got married across the street from the hateful, bigoted Westboro Baptist Church, famous for protesting funerals and their oh-so-biblically inspired “God Hates Fags” signs. Kimberly Kidwell, a 31-year-old EMT, married Katie Short on the front lawn of the Equality House in Topeka Kansas, the rainbow-painted residence owned by Aaron Jackson, one of the founders of the charity Planting Peace. Jackson used Google Earth to find the location of of the Church. He noticed a “for sale” sign on the house across the street and decided to buy it. The website for the House says, “To combat [WBC’s] messages of hate and to support equality and anti-bullying initiatives in schools and in our community, Planting Peace has established the Equality House.” The house will “serve as the resource center for all Planting Peace equality and anti-bullying initiatives and will stand as a visual reminder of our commitment, as global citizens, to equality for all.” Jackson says Equality house attracts 150 a day.
Kidwell and Short live in Arkansas, where same-sex marriage is illegal, as it is in Kansas. They planned to forgo a wedding and wait until it would be legal. But when Jackson posted on Facebook that he was looking for a couple to get married, they jumped at the opportunity. Kidwell and Short were wed by Robin Lunn, an ordained Baptist minister and executive director of the Association of Welcoming and Affirming Baptists, in ceremony consisting of approximately 100 family members, friends and supporters from the community. Local businesses and individuals donated almost everything from the flowers, to the wedding cake. And in lieu of gifts, the couple asked for donations to a Planting Peace marriage equality fundraiser.
There were just so many good quotes from Republican politicians this week, so I apologize to any nut-job I overlooked. It’s impossible to keep up with all the gems coming from Republican and conservative lunatics. Consider this a mere sampling — a tasting menu, if you will.
You may remember Maine’s Republican Governor Paul LePage from when he told the NAACP to kiss his ass. Or maybe it’s from that time he aptly compared the IRS to the Gestapo. (Admit it. The comparison kinda works.) Well, here’s another gem you can add to your treasure trove of LePage-based memories: anal rape jokes.
LePage said that Democratic State Senator Troy Jackson “claims to be for the people, but he’s the first one to give it to the people without providing Vaseline.” In case you were worried that LePage would back down, he added this thoughtful comment later: “Dammit, that comment is not politically correct, but we got to understand who this man is.” When a reporter went out on a limb and suggested people may find the whole Vaseline-free friction-heavy anal sex metaphor offensive, LePage said, “Good. It ought to [be seen as offensive], because I’ve been taking it for two years.”
Never give up! Never give in!
2. A GOP County Chairman Compares a Candidate (In His Own Party!) to a Prostitute
Jim Allen, the Republican Party chairman of Montgomery County, Illinois, sent this email to Republican News Watch editor Doug Ibendahl, about Erika Harold, an African American former Miss America and Republican congressional candidate, challenging Rodney Davis (R-Ill.) in next year’s primary:
“Rodney Davis will win and the love child of the DNC will be back in Shitcago by May of 2014 working for some law firm that needs to meet their quota for minority hires… The little queen touts her abstinence and she won the crown because she got bullied in school…boohoo…kids are cruel, life sucks and you move on.. Now, miss queen is being used like a street walker and her pimps are the DEMOCRAT PARTY and RINO REPUBLICANS.”
He has since resigned. I don’t know why.
3. E.W. Jackson Says Government Programs Are Way Worse Than Slavery
E.W. Jackson, Virginia Republicans’ nominee for lieutenant governor, always has something … original to say. After all, not everyone has the lunatic cojones to say that the gays “poison culture” or call out President Obama’s “Muslim sensibilities.” So, we shouldn’t be surprised that Jackson had this to say about the decline of two parent households among black families:
“[S]lavery did not destroy the black family even though it certainly was an attack on the black family. It made it difficult but I’ll tell you that the programs that began in the ‘60s, the programs that began to tell women that ‘you don’t need a man in the home, the government will take care of you,’ that and began to tell men, ‘you don’t need to be in the home, the government will take care of this woman and take care of these children.’ That’s when the black family began to deteriorate. In 1960 most black children were raised in two-parent, monogamous families. By now, by this time, we have only 20% of black children being raised in two-parent, monogamous families with a married man and woman raising those children. It wasn’t slavery that did that, it was government that did that, trying to solve problems that only God can solve and that only we as human beings can solve.”
He’s right. We should really let God solve the problems facing our society. I’m sure he’ll get to taking care of poverty and sexism and racism … eventually.
We brought you part one of our Feministing Five with the amazing Martha Plimpton. In case you missed it, you’ll want to read about Martha and her A is Fororganization. And now, without further ado, the Feministing Five, part two, with Martha Plimpton.
Katie Halper: You’re going to a desert island, and you’re allowed to take one food, one drink, and one feminist. What do you pick?
Martha Plimpton: Hahahaha. This is really hard. Let’s see. If I’m on a desert island. I mean how desert is it? Does it have coconut trees? Because then I can have coconut water and I don’t have to bring coconut water with me.
KH: Sure. Coconut trees galore.
MP: For food, probably some type of soy based protein, like tofu or something.
KH: Wow. Healthy choices.
MP: I’m just being practical here. But it’s hard to keep tofu fresh. That’s a major drawback. Maybe just soybeans? I’m never good at these desert island questions. Never, ever good. And then one drink. Well I guess I would bring, well, you know, vodka.
KH: Does that mix well with coconut water?
MP: I can mix that with the coconut water.
And one feminist, this is really tough. Oh man. It’s hard to say that I want to bring Bella Abzug. I mean, she’s an amazing woman and I really wish I had ever gotten to meet her. But I could really see how she could get on your nerves after a while. On the other hand, she’s a pretty self-motivated human being and could probably protect me against predators. And she’d be really good at taking charge and knowing what to do.
Within moments or days, the Supreme Court will rule on DOMA (the Defense of Marriage Act), which states that “the word ‘marriage’ means only a legal union between one man and one woman as husband and wife, and the word ‘spouse’ refers only to a person of the opposite sex who is a husband or a wife.’’
And it’s unclear how they will decide. We’ve also seen the fight for marriage equality fought in the streets, with protest signs as weapons. But this battle is as murky as the Supreme Court’s decision. It is really hard to tell which side of the debate has the better signs. Which side is cleverer?
Which side makes more spelling mistakes? To answer these questions, we will have to take a close look and engage in some deep analysis.
1. Homosexuality: the Devil’s Work Or a Great Way to Get P****
While there is some evidence of devil possession among the gays, it is anecdotal, at best. Statistically, lesbians are more attractive than homophobes, so it follows that they would be able to obtain more … success among women. Winner: The Gays!
2. The Issue: Marriage or Marridge
Technically, marriage and not marridge, is made up of one man and one woman. Of course the gentleman carrying the protest sign has a misspelled word as well, but that’s intentional and used to mock the less than stellar spelling record of bigots. And he very may well have come to the protest hoping to defecate on Shirley Phelps, the spokeswoman of Westboro Baptist Church. Once again, this round goes to the gays.
3. Marriage is About: “Sactity” or Equality
Again, the anti-marriage equality protester struggled with spelling. The protesters defending marriage equality, however, have mastered each word on their sign and the sign contains more words. The interracial couple connects the fight for marriage equality based on sexual orientation to the fight for marriage equality based on race (I know! race is a construct. I did go to Wesleyan! But you know what I mean.) They persuasively present marriage as a civil rights issue. I’m sorry homophobes, you lose again.
Miss Utah has been the subject of non-stop attacks for her statement during Sunday evening’s annual Miss USA beauty pageant.
In case you missed it, when a judge asked Marissa Powell, “A recent report shows that in 40 percent of American families with children, women are the primary earners yet they continue to earn less than men. What does this say about society?” her response was:
I think we can relate this back to education and how we are continuing to try to strive to (pause) figure out how to create jobs right now. That is the biggest problem and I think, especially the men, are um, seen as the leaders of this and so we need to try and figure out how to create education better so we can solve this problem.
People called the response “insanely idiotic,” “hard to watch,” a “fantastic flub,” “incoherent,” “the most nonsensical thing ever said in a public forum,” “contrived, faux erudite, and filled with nonsequiturs [sic].”
Was Powell inarticulate, fumbling, awkward and halting? Yes. Was she totally wrong? No. As ThinkProgress notes, “those mocking Miss Utah may be surprised to hear that there were glimmers of truth in her answer: men’s wages and education are much discussed factors in the gender wage gap.”
Ultimately, ThinkProgress points out, education isn’t the cause of the wage disparity since “women’s wages have recently started dropping even as they gain even more higher education than men. And the wage gap is stubbornly persistent despite how much education women take on. The gap appears the moment men and women graduate, with young female graduates earning 82 percent of what their male counterparts earn. It follows them at every level of education as men with the same degree earn more.”
The point is that there is a lot of stupid stuff being said about equal pay. Instead of making fun of a beauty pageant contestant’s response to the issue, shouldn’t we be angrier about the more egregious statements made by the people who actually create or defend the policies which reinforce income disparity? Shouldn’t we highlight when the very people whose job it is to know about this issue say things that are at best nonsensical and at worst dishonest? Here are the five statements that should have received more attention than Powell’s.
1. Kelly “We Have Enough Laws” Ayotte: When asked at a town meeting why she voted against the Paycheck Fairness Act, which would have required employers to demonstrate that any salary differences between men and women doing the same work are not gender-related, the New Hampshire Senator said:
“We have existing laws — Title VII, um, Lilly Ledbetter, all those existing protections in place — that, I believe, enforce and provide that people doing equal jobs are, certainly in this country, should receive equal pay. So, uh, that bill, in my view, didn’t add — in fact I think it created a lot of additional burdens that would have been hard, um, to make it more difficult for job creators to create jobs. . . . The reason that I voted against that specific bill is that, I looked at it, and there were already existing laws that need to be enforced and can be enforced and I didn’t feel like adding that layer was going to help us better get at the equal pay issue.“
Interestingly, despite the already existing burdensome laws, which are, like, so annoying, women make 77 cents for every mans’ dollar. Guess the laws aren’t so burdensome, after all.
2. Marsha “Women Don’t Want Equal Pay Laws, Thank You Very Much” Blackburn: When David Axelrod ridiculously suggested we enact “pay equity laws to ensure that women are treated fairly in the workplace” on Meet the Press, Tennessee Congresswoman had this to say:
“I think that more important than that is making certain that women are recognized by those companies. You know, I’ve always said that I didn’t want to be given a job because I was a female, I wanted it because I was the most well-qualified person for the job. And making certain that companies are going to move forward in that vein, that is what women want. They don’t want the decisions made in Washington. They want to be able to have the power and the control and the ability to make those decisions for themselves.”
In other words, we women would like the power to be able to be discriminated against. Amen!
As Congress debates imposing a 20 week ban on abortion, Rep. Michael Burgess (R-TX) urges banning the procedure at 15 or 16 weeks. Why, you ask? Because, simply put, fetuses like to jerk off. And how could we deny them of that god-given right? Burgess, who was also an OB/GYN said:
“Watch a sonogram of a 15-week baby, and they have movements that are purposeful… They stroke their face. If they’re a male baby, they may have their hand between their legs. If they feel pleasure, why is it so hard to believe that they could feel pain?”
Those of us concerned about the sexual assaultepidemic ravaging the military can all the chill out, thanks to some really awesome news: women who join the military are pathological freaks who make up stories about being raped out of spite, for money or for attention. This, at least, is the opinion of esteemed (by fellow homophobic-racist- misogynists) “journalist” John Derbyshire. If that name sounds familiar, you’re either a FHRM (fellow homophobic-racist-misogynist) or you remember when Derbyshire urged white parents to follow his lead and have that really important, life-saving talk with their children about the birds and the bees the blacks. He advised his own children to, among other racist tricks, “(10a) Avoid concentrations of blacks not all known to you personally,” “(10b) Stay out of heavily black neighborhoods,” “If planning a trip to a beach or amusement park at some date, find out whether it is likely to be swamped with blacks on that date.” This got him fired from The National Review.
Luckily for him, and us, Taki’s Magazine, which describes itself as “a Libertarian webzine” and calls itself by the affectionate nickname “Takimag,” welcomed Drebyshire with open arms and he joined the ranks of FHRM columnists like Pat Buchanan. In an article for his cleverly named “Derbtown” column, called “The Sexual Harassment Panic” (I love it already), “the Derb” (if you will, and I hope you will) explains that he’s just here to help: “My work here aims to be constructive: to apprise the US military of some true facts that might assist them in pushing back against the USC tsunami.” He then lays out his points with the same organization and clarity he did in his article on the blacks. I paraphrase but also include his original language to demonstrate the importance of his argument, the precision of his language, and the shocking fact that I’m not exaggerating or distorting his screed. But perhaps my greatest motivation for pasting screenshots instead of linking to the article is this plea that appears when I copy and paste the text:
“Please share this article by using the link below. When you cut and paste an article, Taki’s Magazine misses out on traffic, and our writers don’t get paid for their work.”
This week Rep. Trent Franks (R-Ariz.) garnered national attention for saying that rape only rarely resulted in pregnancy. This is no isolated incident. Who can forget when Todd Akin spoke of “legitimate rapes” and women shutting “the whole thing down”? But less known is that this argument has been said again and again by several Republicans. Though completely false — a study found that over 32,100 pregnancies result from rape each year and some studies have found that rape victims are more likely to become pregnant than women who have consensual sex — the claim that raped women don’t become pregnant is a nice way for Republicans to try to fend off arguments for including exceptions for rape and incest in abortion legislation. See, most Americans, even most Republicans and even most anti-choicerssupport exceptions in cases of rape and incest.
So, what is a Republican who wants to ban abortion in all cases, with no exceptions whatsoever, to do? Well, he or she merely claims that it’s not an issue because rape victims don’t get pregnant. See, for example, the way Bush-appointed Judge James Leon Holmes explicitly used the lie that pregnancy never results from rape to support a constitutional ban on abortion: “Concern for rape victims is a red herring because conceptions from rape occur with approximately the same frequency as snowfall in Miami.” You hear that rape victims? You’re a red herring. The whole lot of you! Abortion-or-bust absolutist Republicans have found a way to deal with the inconvenient fact that most Americans support exceptions to save the woman’s life, too: pretend that pregnancy is never dangerous and never puts a woman’s life at risk. It’s not true, but that doesn’t stop these abortion fundamentalists! Are you seeing a pattern?
Here are some of the outrageous ways they have explained the lie that raped women can’t get pregnant, as well as reaction GIFs to what they say. Enjoy! (Thanks to Garance Franke-Ruta andAnna North for finding a bunch of these gems).
1. Trent “She’s Totes Not Gonna Get Preggers” Franks
Trent Franks was minding his own business, trying to pass his proposal to ban all abortions after 20 weeks with no exceptions, when some uppity Democrat had to bring up the issue of … well … rape and incest. Franks responded by saying, “The incidence of rape resulting in pregnancy are very low.”
I admire your commitment to extremist anti-choice legislation. Why let facts and reality stand in your way?
2. Todd “Shut That Whole Thing Down” Akin
Rep. Todd Akin, the Republican nominee for Senate in Missouri who ran against Sen. Claire McCaskill gave his opponent the best gift ever when he said, “from what I understand from doctors [pregnancy from rape] is really rare … If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.”
Despite hypocritical calls from Republicans who basically agree with Akin, at least policy-wise but know better than to say crazy things out loud, the Congressman stuck it out. And Senator McCaskill won the election. It was a “legitimate” election and she kinda “shut that whole thing down.”
Yesterday (Tuesday) was an extremely productive day for bigots around the world. Who knows what gems of ignorance we’ll see today, let alone throughout the week. For now, we can enjoy the following:
1. Jury selection in the murder trial against George Zimmerman started this week. Zimmerman is on trial for killing Trayvon Martin, an unarmed African American teenager.
While on Fox News, Former NYPD detective Harry Houck had the following to say about the case: “Listen, Trayvon Martin would be alive today, okay, if he didn’t, alright, have a street attitude.” It’s pretty clear that “a street attitude” is code for “being black” and wearing a hoodie. As if either of those things justifies getting out of your car, ignoring a 9/11 dispatcher who tells you to remain in your car and shooting someone to death.
2. On his 700 Club show, televangelist Pat Robertson lamented the Boys Scouts of America’s decision to overturn its ban on gay members. Robertson attacked the LGBT community for being:
… willing to rip apart the framework of traditional marriage, to rip apart an organization that has done so much good for young people… All for one thing, that the way they do sex will be accepted in the mainstream of society… Two percent deciding what the rest of us does… And they are willing to destroy it, and Hollywood the so-called liberal media had jumped on board that this is the new civil rights. Well, I don’t think so. It’s been a marvelous institution, and to see that torn up in order to accommodate a few kids who want to do sex with each other, I mean, it boggles the mind.
I’m sure Robertson takes some comfort in knowing the Boy Scouts haven’t relented entirely to the equal-rightist attack on good old-fashioned-American homophobia, since they’ve maintained their ban on LGBT adult leaders. Phew!
Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY) has been one of the most vocal and valiant critics of the way the military has responded to the epidemic of sexual assault. Gillibrand had put forth a proposal, which had 27 co-sponsors, including 4 Republicans, to remove sexual assault cases from the chain of command and place them in hands of an independent prosecutor. Gillibrand succinctlyexplained the problem inherent in leaving the decision making power within the chain of command: “When any single victim of sexual assault is forced to salute her attacker, clearly our system is broken.”
Lest you think Gillibrand is some civilian utopionist, out of touch with the gritty realities of military life, you should know that SWAN (Service Women’s Action Network) also supportstaking the handling of sexual assault crimes out of the chain of command, since,
“Apart from compromising impartiality, the current system places victims at risk of retaliation by vesting authority in a figure who often exercises control over the career advancement of both parties. By approaching criminal justice from a personnel perspective, this policy promotes widespread fear of reprisal, creating a significant barrier to reporting… SWAN proposes that the United States military move the administration of criminal justice from commanding officers to professional prosecutors and judges.”
katiehalper.com 