Rapper and Bernie Sanders endorser Killer Mike made a terrible mistake on Tuesday night when he quoted “a woman” who used the word “uterus,” during a speech at Morehouse College in Atlanta. Twitter and several media outlets blasted Michael Render, AKA Killer Mike, for sexism. Interestingly, most of them didn’t bother to explain what he was really saying or who the woman he had cited was: feminist, anti-racist educator and activist Jane Elliott.
When people tell us ‘hold on, wait a while’ – that’s what the other Democrat is telling you, ‘Hold on Black Lives Matter, just wait a while. Hold on young people in this country, just wait a while,’ And then she get good, she have your own momma come to you, your momma sit down and say, ‘Well you’re a woman.’
Render is describing what he sees as an attempt on Clinton’s part to appeal to gender identity to get the vote. Whether or not you think this is accurate is another question. But we can all agree on what he’s saying. He goes on:
I talked to Jane Elliott a few weeks ago, and Jane said, ‘Michael, a uterus doesn’t qualify you to be president of the United States. You have to have policies that’s reflective of social justice.’ ”
To me, it’s pretty clear what Render is saying here. Again, you don’t have to agree with him, but the point he is making is that policies and not gender determine whether someone is actually promoting social justice.
Somehow the takeaway from this was,”Killer Mike Quotes Woman Saying ‘Having a Uterus Doesn’t Qualify You to Be POTUS’” as Blue Nation Review headline put it. The Hill said, “Rapper Killer Mike drew attention late Tuesday after saying during a rally for Democratic presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders that a “uterus doesn’t qualify you to be president.” And Mediaitewrote that he “got pretty fired up about Team Clinton saying “just wait a while” and quoted a woman who told him, “A uterus doesn’t qualify you to be President of the United States.”
Bill Maher recently described Donald Trump as “the white Kanye.” But Maher, who’s not known for his in-depth hip-hop knowledge, is a little off with that comparison. If anything, Trump is more like Kanye West’s sometime frenemy 50 Cent. The overlap between the two larger-than-life figures is so far-reaching that it’s a little eerie. Come to think of it, have you ever actually seen 50 Cent and Trump in the same place at the same time? The Nightly Show‘s Mike Yard called Trump “the 50 Cent of the Republican Party” this week. We’ll go even farther: We propose that the Donald and 50 are actually the same person. Here’s our airtight case:
1. They both represent Queens.
Not only did Trump and 50 grow up in the same New York borough – they’re both from Jamaica, Queens. To be fair, the two men are products of very different parts of the neighborhood. Trump was raised in the bucolic Jamaica Estates, a moneyed community founded at the turn of the century, while 50 Cent grew up in working-class South Jamaica.
2. They’re both renaissance men of business.
Trump followed in his wealthy father’s footsteps, working for his old man’s real estate firm, which he eventually took over and expanded. In addition to owning worldwide residential real estate, hotels, resorts and, of course, golf courses, the Donald has developed products and ventures including Trump Restaurants (located in Trump Tower and consisting of Trump Buffet, Trump Catering, Trump Ice Cream Parlor, and Trump Bar), GoTrump (an online travel website), Donald J. Trump Signature Collection (menswear, men’s accessories and watches), Donald Trump the Fragrance, Trump magazine, Trump Golf, Trump Chocolate, Trump home (home furnishings), Trump Productions (a television production company), Trump Institute, Trump the Game (a 1989 board game), Donald Trump’s Real Estate Tycoon (a business simulation game), Trump Books, Trump Model Management, Trump Shuttle (an airline), Trump Ice (bottled water), Trump Vodka and Trump Steaks. And, until recently, The Apprentice on NBC!
50 Cent, meanwhile, followed his late mother into the drug trade around age 12. Beyond his own lucrative rap career, he’s founded G-Unit Records and G-Unit Clothing. Like Trump, he dipped into the beverage business, releasing an enhanced drink called Formula 50 with Vitamin Water. On the olfactory front, he joined forces with Right Guard deodorant to put his name on Pure 50 RGX body spray. He tried, and failed, to penetrate the prophylactic market with Magic Stick Condoms. And he had his own Apprentice-esque show called 50 Cent: The Money and The Power on MTV.
3. They’re both bestselling authors.
Donald Trump has written over a dozen books, including the bestseller Trump: The Art of the Deal. Less well-known but equally transformative titles include Think BIG and Kick Ass in Business and Life, Trump: How to Get Rich and Trump: The Best Golf Advice I Ever Received.
50 Cent launched his own publishing imprint, G-Unit Books, and is the author of successful volumes like The Fiftieth Law, Formula 50: A 6-Week Workout and Nutrition Plan That Will Transform Your Life, and 50 X 50: 50 Cent in His Own Words. Unlike Trump, however, 50 has also branched out into fiction, writing novels like Death Before Dishonor and Harlem Heat.
4. They both love to brag about how rich they are.
It would take all year to compile all of Trump’s boasts, so let’s focus on four gems – all taken from his presidential announcement speech last month. “I’m really rich, I’m really rich,” he observed at one point. “I’ll show you in a second. I’m not saying that in a bragging way.” And: “I’m proud of my net worth. I’ve done an amazing job.” And: “I have the best [golf] courses in the world.” Also: “One of the big banks came to me and said, ‘Donald, you don’t have enough borrowings. Could we loan you $4 billion?’ I said, ‘I don’t need it.’ ”
50 Cent is proud of his net worth, too. Since we stuck to four examples for Trump, we’ll do the same here. From “I Get Money”: “Have a baby by me, baby, be a millionaire!/I’ll write the check before the baby comes, who the fuck cares?” From “Piggy Bank”: “Clickity-clank, clickity-clank/The money goes into my piggy bank.” From “Money”: “I’m eating, I get money…I shit money/It smells like Benjamins, it boosts my adrenaline.” From “Straight to the Bank”: “I’m laughing straight to the bank with this…./I keep nothing but hundred dollar bills in the bankroll/I got the kind of money that the bank can’t hold.”
5. They both declared bankruptcy.
What makes all of this bragging kind of awkward is when you have to declare bankruptcy. Donald Trump’s companies did so four times: Trump’s Taj Mahal casino in Atlantic City in 1991, Trump Plaza Hotel in Atlantic City in 1992, Trump Hotels and Casinos Resorts in 2004 and Trump Entertainment Resorts in 2009. Whoops!
Funnily enough, even though Forbes estimated that 50 Cent had a net worth of $150 million just this May, he had to file for bankruptcy in July. Coincidentally, his financial woes occurred right around the time a jury was determining how much money he would have to pay in damages to a woman whose sex tape he allegedly posted online without her permission. The jury decided on $5 million. In response, 50’s lawyer said his client’s net worth is just 4.4 million! What are the odds? So how could a man worth so relatively little have such a brag-worthy lifestyle? The rapper testified that he borrowed his cars and jewelry. They were lies! All lies!
6. They both have lots of beefs with other famous people.
The lawsuit above was the end result of an old feud between 50 and Rick Ross: The only reason 50 leaked the sex tape at all is because it allegedly featured Ross’ ex. 50 Cent has also had public beefs with rappers from Ja Rule to Fat Joe to Jadakiss to Cam’Ron to Lil Wayne to his own former protégés the Game and Young Buck …and many more.
We’ll never know exactly how many people Trump has picked fights with, but a few of his targets include President Obama, Rosie O’Donnell, Russell Brand, Jay Leno, Cher, Neil Patrick Harris, Lawrence O’Donnell, Arianna Huffington, Jon Stewart – and most recently, John McCain. Last weekend, Trump went after the Arizona Senator for having been a prisoner of war (classy!): “He’s not a war hero… I like people who weren’t captured.” On Tuesday, South Carolina Senator Lindsey Graham responded by calling Trump a jackass. Hours later, Trump gave out Graham’s private phone number during a speech.
Trump is also in a public spat with the entire country of Mexico after his tasteless anti-Latino comments. So, there’s that.
7. They’re both Republicans . . . sort of.
Donald Trump is currently seeking the Republican Party’s 2016 presidential nomination. During a speech delivered from the border at Laredo, Texas, on Thursday, Trump said, “Look, I’m a Republican . . . I’m a conservative. I’m running. I’m in first place by a lot, it seems, according to all the polls. I want to run as a Republican. I think I’ll get the nomination.” But loyalty is a two-way street, as Trump made clear in an interview with The Hill on Wednesday: “The RNC has not been supportive. They were always supportive when I was a contributor. I was their fair-haired boy. The RNC has been, I think, very foolish.” A third-party run is a possibility if he fails to secure the GOP nomination.
50 is also a man of political contradictions, and is probably the only rumored Republican to make a PSA in support of Occupy Wall Street. He also espoused some Jerry Falwell-esque views on Hurricane Katrina in 2005, saying, “The New Orleans disaster was meant to happen. It was an act of God.” But that’s nothing compared to the praise 50 heaped on George W. Bush the same year, calling Bush “incredible . . . a gangsta. I wanna meet George Bush, just shake his hand and tell him how much of me I see in him.”
Republicans are notorious for using artists’ music without their permission, sometimes hijacking songs critical of Republican values. During his 1984 presidential campaign, Ronald Reagan tried to use Bruce Springsteen’s “Born in the U.S.A.” – somehow missing its critique of American exceptionalism and militarism. Springsteen said no, but that didn’t stop Reagan from quoting it in a stump speech.
Cut to 2015, and Donald Trump has set his presidential announcement to Neil Young’s “Rockin’ in the Free World“ – a pretty clear indictment of George Bush the first – prompting the Canadian rocker to chastise the Donald and endorse Bernie Sanders.
To help other Republicans who may be struggling to choose an appropriate campaign song, we’ve put together a list of tracks that would work well for some of the 2016 presidential hopefuls.
Jeb Bush: “Chain Gang,” Sam Cooke
Bush, one of the frontrunners in the crowded GOP field, has this advice for Americans: Work longer hours! Oh, and by the way, don’t ask for overtime. This song seems to embody his ethos, which – as you can imagine – has gone over super well with already overworked voters.
Ben Carson: “Hands,” Jewel
Carson isn’t only a presidential hopeful and Tea Party darling – he’s also a renowned neurosurgeon who wrote a 1996 memoir called Gifted Hands: The Ben Carson Story (which became a made-for-TV movie with Cuba Gooding Jr.). Carson is almost certainly not going to be president, so Gifted Hands might be his most lasting legacy. Play him out, Jewel.
Speaking at a Strafford County Republican Committee meeting in New Hampshire in March, Cruz vilified President Obama and the Democrats – as is his wont – and described the world as being “on fire.” When a three-year-old girl from the audience asked the senator, “The world is on fire?” Cruz responded by surely terrifying her: “Yes!” he exclaimed. “Your world is on fire! But you know what? Your mommy is here and everyone is here to make sure that the world you grow up in is even better.”
“Your World Is on Fire” unfortunately hasn’t been recorded yet, so this will have to do in the meantime.
Carly Fiorina: “Got Your Money,” Ol’ Dirty Bastard Featuring Kelis
With no political experience under her belt, Fiorina likes to sell herself as a good businesswoman. Unfortunately, her track record is so bad, a high-level former campaign staffer once said, “I’d rather go to Iraq than work for Carly Fiorina again.” And a dozen people who worked on Fiorina’s unsuccessful 2010 Senate campaign have said they wouldn’t work for her presidential campaign, because she didn’t pay them. In all fairness, Fiorina, who is worth $120 million, had other financial obligations after her Senate bid: She repaid herself $1.2 million and then bought a $6 million five-acre waterfront estate in Virginia.
Bobby Jindal: “The Exorcist” Theme Song
Plenty of dudes brag about college exploits. Jindal is no different – except the wild time he talks about involves an apparent exorcism. This song will remind people of the Louisiana governor’s healing powers.
George Pataki: “Say My Name,” Destiny’s Child
Pataki is almost as memorable and charismatic as Anne Veal of Arrested Development. (“Who?”) This song may be the former New York governor’s only shot at fixing his name recognition problem.
Rick Perry: “Oops!. . .I Did It Again,” Britney Spears
If there’s anyone this Britney classic would be appropriate for, it’s Perry, who during a 2011 Republican debate couldn’t remember the third government agency he would absolutely, positively, most definitely cut as president. “I will tell you, it’s three agencies of government when I get there that are gone. Commerce, education and the, um, what’s the third one there?” he said. “Oops.”
Donald Trump: “Hot Stepper,” Ini Kamoze
It’s grandiose, inappropriate and awkward – yet undeniably amusing. It’s like it was handcrafted for the Donald’s campaign.